Positive vs. Negative Self Talk

By Bailey C.

“How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.” —Rupi Kaur.

When we repeatedly tell ourselves we aren’t good enough, after time it becomes your altered perception of yourself. This influences how others begin to view you. When you see yourself as someone who is unworthy, unlovable, unacceptable, this perception becomes your reality. While it is not true, our anxieties can speak louder than our strengths.

What we say to ourselves is far more important than what anyone else could ever say to us. Unfortunately, it is much more common to fixate on what we wish to change about ourselves.

One of the biggest hindrances of negative self-talk is the eventual inability to grow or change in positive ways. We become so enthralled in the fixations we wish to change rather than the things we like about ourselves, that we stunt our own emotional growth.

This reinforces the idea that change, vulnerability, and individuality are things we need to avoid.

With this idea that we cannot grow when we give voice to our insecurities, we limit ourselves from possibilities and opportunities. Most importantly, we lose sight of who we are. We fixate on imperfections rather than celebrating them. Our inner voices are reflective of how we feel about ourselves. Self talk and self love are an inverse relationship. When one improves, so will the other.

Our inner voices are reflective of how we feel about ourselves. Self talk and self love are an inverse relationship. When one improves, so will the other.

Advice for anyone struggling with self love: Start by saying one nice thing about yourself a day. Spend time with yourself and identify what you do alone that makes you feel joy. You may be surprised by the positive results.